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Is that likely to be a lead pipe? Is there any wiggle room in it and could you get a pipe cutter round it?
Otherwise angle grind it enough to bury it in the ceiling and then fill the gap wouldn't worry about being too neat as it looks a bit of a dogs dinner up there anyway, so more about hiding it and getting a good finish on the make good -
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@chrisbmx116 is a big fan of front garden seating and think @cozey maybe also. I think it's a nice idea, would probably have it against the front window (so drinks/pizza/canapes can easily be passed out)
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@cozey where was that bamboo link ?
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If it were me something like:
Remove front hedge, replace with Corten steel planter of bamboo.
Brick weave paving (or whatever you dancy)around circumference of garden
Replace gravel with four square raised beds with brick weave paving between (or could keep gravel to make cheaper)
Bin store at left hand edge and replace ropey hedge with some more colourful plants -
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I'm with @mmccarthy - what I've found since moving to a naked portafilter and VST basket - pull much better shots but wetter pucks. Judge it on quality of spros rather than what a puck looks like imo
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Screwfix have a Macallister angle grinder for £25 if you can't borrow something, which should do the job