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Boys, boys! I slip away for a few minutes and we're half way round the f'ng world! Concentrate now.

Hammersmith, to steady the ship.

You think you can play a late Clentador masquerade in a three square Horbitser? Come on, sharpen up!

Stepney Green

Saw the Weisenhoff Pass coming a mile off - best switch I've seen since Tokyo '73. Nice.

Stamford Brook

That's understandable if you missed the Meakin-Wall reverse a few plays ago. Straighwall automatically follows of course.

Old Street

Oft neglected indeed and for good reason. A Boston Manor in a Straighwall variation means you miss the next two plays. Cool as a cucumber we have...

Kilburn High Road

and for a double fraumeiler it's...

Euston Square

OK, back from a double espresso or two...

Great Portland Street

One word, Mr 'Squireage clever dickie'...

Elephant and Castle!

A Sunday morning fouble-parr was, as you well know, superseded by Morgan Fletcher in 1996. Nice try, sonny!

Blackfriars

Are you sure that Bank is allowed at this point in the game under the Morgan Fletcher variation?

An early Southfields played as a cross-quarter eh, I didn't see that coming I'll admit. OK, if you must...

Morden

+1

Oh sure, metric. That is an undisclosed Thatcher and you knew it. Good call.

Take Brondesbury! Ha

..

archway, shuffle to kentish town

Shuffling? after 8? Brilliant!

High Street Ken

crabtree was a revisionist hypocrite

but his trousers were always well pressed.

Royal Oak

Oh for goodness sake, you know that doesn't cook at all under the Crabtree variation.

Southwark

Rotherhithe?! Now we're motoring.

Walthamstow Central

Blx to Fenymann anyway - all disproved in the Tarprim case.

Saint Johns Wood

surely that would constitute an obstructed hermonger so impossible to execute?

Oof!

absobloodylutely!

West Ham

Aldgate East

east ham,

Oh, that's a double knottage and instant vilification I'm afraid

^^^ The Hammersmith & City station, of course. The Central line station would be a clear colour mix generation violation.

Wise words! I'm glad someone is paying attention.

Stonebridge Park