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Yeah, innit! Except if you swear lots then you will find that people at work won't be able to view the site because of firewall safe-mode issues. That's what happened with MT.

Did I already post this? Can't remember. Must be getting old.

Fixies are for c***s. (That was for anyone who might have thought I was mellowing with age).

Why Buffalo Bill?

Well I was there - first race in 18 months - hurt like hell. Forgotten how much racing hurts. And how much fun it is.

fakengers! Brewer Street, innit.

Britool 10mm ring spanner.

Cheeky c***s.

Phew! That's better.

Lots of Audaxers swear by GPS (Garmin) and fellow evil genius Kaspar von MetroKontrollar has one for his Dartmoor rides. He swears by it, but I'm with David. I used Microsoft Autoroute and it is blinding for finding mad routes and giving you kilo counts, it takes all the fun out of it.

Like the man said above, sometimes it's cool to just follow your nose and get a bit lost.

Oh shit, I must be negative street-cred by now.

what?

You lot are just a bunch teasers. I'm not playing with you anymore.

Anyway WTF am I posting about map-holders on a fixie forum. Whoops! There goes what little remained of my street-cred.

I already told him to naff off back to SafeSpeed or be deleted...

Help! I got one over on the MT forum....

Oh yeah? Who?

If you're doing 150+k most days, I recommend the AA Touring Map. It's pretty clear at 1:180 000, and has enough detail that you can find the quiet roads, but it's big enough that you're not carrying around a whole book for a 1000k trip.

There are various Michelin scales and shapes, with the famous chevrons 1 = hill, 2 = steep, 3 = get off and walk unless you got a granny gear, but I found them too small or too big and way too flimsy. Which is a shame, cos I love the old 2 series maps 1:200 000 covering whole regions.

I would definitely get a klickfix map holder as well. I started using one for Audax and did my 2005 tour using one. Last year I left it behind and REALLY missed it. Brilliant bit of kit that will fit on OS stems as well.

Cycling in France really spoils you for the UK. After riding nice smooth empty roads through beautiful scenery, it's pretty grotty coming back to crap busy roads through Essex.

If it pisses you off, don't go. I quit riding them for ages cos I stopped enjoying them. Last one was pretty fun, but maybe that was only because I hadn't done for ages. It definitely is more fun if there are a lot of people there that you know though.

Not out of work til 7pm on Friday. Doubt that I'll make it.

Nah, just ignore it. Or put something in the posting guidelines. It's a free country, after all.

And check out the commuter who invaded the Moving Target Forum to try and start an RLJ debate!

This 'news' story is old. See here.

Sounds like a nice tour!

I have done a couple of tours in France, one from Calais to Basel, and another starting in Dieppe and making a 1400k circle down to the Loire, heading west and then back along the coast to Dieppe.

I think you would be ill-advised to ride fixed (unless you are really experienced - which case you prob wouldn't be asking).

France is not flat - apart from the Plat de Crau (way in the South) - always hilly. Brittany is particularly hill, and even Picardy is not really flat.

mdja: One of my friends explained to his father what a fixed wheel bike is and he said "Oh, you mean a clown bike" because the only place he's seen them is in the circus, ridden by clowns. Backwards.

Hahahahaha!!!

His dad is obviously a very perceptive fellow!

RPM: if some pig knocks me off my bike he'd better make a good job of it, cos if I get up there'll be a good reason to arrest me.

I think the motto of the story is:

if you do a runner from the dibble make sure they don't catch you.

I did edit the story for names etc for obvious reasons.