Wanted: Plumber - Herne Hill

You've been trying to unblock the pipes for 8 months? That's dedication!

(nice to see you Christmas morning spags, I was off to take my parent's dog for a beautiful, early morning walk on Dawson's Heights - hoping to see the Christmas morning sun rise over London. Fog and ice kinda scuppered the dream! Hope you enjoyed Waifs and Strays and whatever the fuck you were doing in Tulse Hill?)

For future reference, if anyone's toilet ever gets blocked, use a mop (old fashioned type with the dreadlocks type hair/head) as opposed to a plunger, go at it like a swine on speed and it nails the blockage. Then pour some caustic soda in afterwards for good measure.

If it's still blocked, I have one of those long spring things that you can feed down the waste pipe and wiggle around to dislodge gunk. I worked for use when our bathroom basin waste pipe clogged up a good few feet beyond where it went out through the external wall. You're welcome to borrow this springy thing if you like - I'm in SE23.

For blocked drains further down the system I also have a set of rods - came in handy a couple of months back but it was a nasty and challenging job. But pleased to report they can be strapped to the top tube of a bike.