We've all been there go to a country where you're not meant to drink tap water, forget, drink tap water. 2 hours go by and you feel that unmistakable rumble in your digestive track. You say to yourself "O oh! I'd better find a toilet and fast!" You begin to head towards the toilet at a leisurely pace and are overtaken by greasy cold sweats that mean one thing and one thing only. You say to yourself "fuck me, I'd better hurry up" and break into a run, as you move you can feel the hot liquid shit moving about in your bowels. Then you see it shang-ri-la the shitter! It doesn't matter how bad it is it means you won't have to find your way back to where you're staying while trying to hide the fact you have dyed your trousers a bile green shade of brown.
You make it into the bog without shitting yourself and while clenching your sphincter with every ounce of strength you have you waddle to the cubicle. Trousers drop to the floor, the force of clenching makes it difficult to move now your lower body is completely rigid so you wobble round so the toilet is in the right place. This is going to feel good. You begin to lower yourself to the toilet and hope you can hold on.
nice arc of suspense right there
To be honest, that is pretty much me after the first half a litre of really strong coffee in the morning.
It's real but I don't know if it's meant to be parody or not or what.
Same way I feel about life!
IDF twitter account is top lols.
that last one... for @markypoos @lolabelle. happy Xmas!
that horse needs a " soon "
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