Jokes / Joke du jour!

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  • I just tried that with my 6 year old.
    “Huh?”
    “A mountaineer is someone who climbs mountains. That’s the joke.”
    “Oh.”

  • Yeah - it didn't work on my 5yo until we explained it. She now tells it (slightly wrong) to everyone she meets. It was adorable the first 50 times.

  • Do you know the visual/sound effect gags involving engineers (engineer-ears), motorist (motor-wrist) and terrorist (terror-wrist)? Difficult to describe but I'm sure you could improvise. Hilarious/groan-inducing depending on your audience. :)

  • My local hairdresser has started serving Sunday lunch. I went yesterday and had roast beef, with all the trimmings.

  • Do you know the visual/sound effect gags involving engineers (engineer-ears), motorist (motor-wrist) and terrorist (terror-wrist)? Difficult to describe but I'm sure you could improvise. Hilarious/groan-inducing depending on your audience. :)

    Add in Viscous Circle (move hand in circle, snarling) and micro-wave (make very small wave with fingers)

  • micro-wave (make very small wave with fingers)

    :`-)

  • My dog's book of poetry was rejected by the publishers cos none of the bark odes scanned.

  • Yes, forgot those. My other non-pun based visual gags for entertaining wee ones include pea-on-a-fork, spider with a big head and spider doing press-ups on a mirror.

  • My grandad was killed by a zulu.

    He was taking a shit at Whipsnade and the roof collapsed.

  • ^ liked!

  • What do you get if you cross Bill Clinton and Donald Trump?

    You get found dead in your cell.

  • Oof!

  • I've just seen a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap.

  • he he he!!

  • I've just seen William Archibald Spooner wearing a cat flap.

    ftfy

  • Me: Can I have some money to buy new guitar strings to play in an alternative tuning?
    My father: No.
    Me: But DAAADD!!!

    guitar nerds thread

  • Hehehe!

  • me "My owl thinks it's a duck".
    Vet "I see. And is this causing any problems?"
    Me " Just the incessant wise quacks."

  • Apparently VIAGRA... wont make you James Bond, but it will make you Roger Moore

  • Q: why did Jeff Bezos get divorced?
    A: he found out marriage counts as a union.

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Jokes / Joke du jour!

Posted by Avatar for Pistanator @Pistanator

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