Build a hypothetical post-apocalypse bicycle

Done it, now what

[]fixed drive train, no brakes, for easy maintenance
[]two different size wheels so you can use whatever size spares you find
[]risers for comfort, aerobars for escaping zombies/marauding bike gangs/etc.
[]high bb so you sit extra high and easily keep a look out for the aforementioned
[]some bodhisattva I forget which hanging off the saddle to give you good luck
[]small number of spokes for less maintenance, can be replaced with new ones carved from branches
[]ignore clipless it now has/would have clips and straps
[]rad colour and intimidating design to impress people and command their respect
[*]logo of the toughest bike gang possible, same reason

Aero bars could be used for mounting, or be converted into, guns/grenade launchers/bayonets....