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@chris_crash
i got robbed once, when I was 16, had been partying and the car was out of gas, so i stopped at a station downtown, me and my girl at the time managed to cobble together something like 86 cents between us, and hoped to get back to my place on that. Between the party and the gas station we had stopped to acquire food, and i had a banana in my jacket pocket (this is important). walking into the station, there was a bum/guy asking for change to make a phone call. my better judgment had gone to alcohol, so i told him i had no change, but he could use my mobile. hand it over, and he takes it, then turns and legs it. I chase him and we end up in a dark, dead end ally. First thought, I've got the bastard, second thought, oh shit now what. I say "give me back my phone" he says no, i reach into my jacket pocket, grab my knife (one of those multi tools) thinking to scare him, and pull out a banana. then the kind of inspiration that can only strike a drunk 16 year old hits, and i point the banana at his chest and say "I've got a gun give me the fucking phone", he says "you aint gonna shoot me over a phone". now if i had a real gun, i could have fired off a warning shot, but i had a banana, so i just have to keep faking it, theres a bit of "im going to fucking shoot you" and "you don't have the balls" then my girl arrived on the seen and planted her steel toed boot square in the guys balls, while he was arguing with me over who was going to shoot who. we got the phone back and leged it back to the car.
moral of the story, if your going to do something as stupid as threaten a bum with a banana make sure you have a hardcore punkass girl to back you up.